Sunday, December 11, 2011

-12- *sunday special* Let's go nuts!

 I decided that every Sunday special will be a series of somewhat illogical and probably crazy things that come on my mind from time to time. Like suggestions on what to do occasionally for fun, just when sanity gets too mundane (and it often does), and you want to make a big scene and go crazy.

Suggestion the first. On every Olympics, there should be a wild card sport. As in, some unlucky sports team that prepped for four years for one sport, gets picked for a completely different sport, for no reason. That will definitely spice things up, in my perspective. Think about how fun that would  be to watch. After all, the Olympics now are full of one sided individuals; sports athletes that are all great in their regard, but are not multi talented. Having the possibility of being picked for a completely different sport would definitely promote at least some interests in those people on trying new things.

Suggestion the second. Reinstate dueling. None of the yu gi oh, crap, allow people with guns to go and fight people with guns that they don't like. It would solve a lot of problems. Tired of listening to your professor that you hate? Duel him. If you win, you get a new professor. If you lose... well at least you're not listening to him anymore. Overpopulation would stop being a problem. So would low self esteem, although that's a stretch. I do know one thing though, if I win a duel, I suddenly will appreciate my life a lot better. No time for being depressed when things are life or death, right?

Suggestion the third. Institute a shock punishment for every time a person says that he or she is bored. At birth, everyone should have a small chip installed in their brain that causes severe pain whenever you utter the word bored. I've had enough of all the bored people in this world. If you're bored, it means you should find something better to do, not sit there and do nothing. A lot of people need to get up off their asses and go do stuff. I'm sure a little pain will go a long way to making this world a little better.

Suggestion the fourth. Once a week, every week, a family has to go outside and hunt down and kill an animal. And then eat it. Why? I'm tired of the pretentious people talking about animal rights. There are no such things as animal rights. Animal rights exist for as long as you're not hungry, and these prestigious people who don't realize where their food is coming from need to shut up and take a good look. Vegetarians are off the hook I guess, because I can't get creative enough to think about what to do with them. Then again, being vegetarian is a torture in its own way.

Suggestion the fifth. Pigeon feeding should be a crime. Every person caught feeding pigeons should be promptly escorted to a private facility where he would be attacked by people dressed up as pigeons until he swears he or she will never do it again. Repeated offenses would lead to having the person dressed up as a pigeon (in a suit he or she can't take off), for the rest of their lives.

Suggestion the sixth. One out of every two handguns should look and feel like the real thing but would instead shoot out those little flags that say bang. Why? Imagine an intense shoot out where half the guns don't work. Suddenly people don't want to fight as much, do they? It would cut every gun related crime/risk by half, and combined with the suggestion to do duels, it would also increase the chances of great stories to tell to your grand kids (of course that's a 50-50 chance. 1/4 that your gun messed up and you died, 1-4 that both guns work and you won, 1-4 that the other guy's gun messed up and you won, and 1-4 that both guns didn't work and you partied).

More suggestions on next Sunday

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